With the end of summer fast approaching, I've been searching for glimpses of autumn in the world around me. A sharper gust of wind, a cooler shift in the air, an early golden leaf. Baby A. is my constant companion in these outdoor jaunts, peeping over my shoulder and looking high up into the clouds from her vantage point in the carrier. I have to try pushing her around in the stroller because she's getting bigger and bigger - where does the time go?
Motherhood has become a sort of coming-of-age story for me, an awakening. If I could go back in the past I'd tell myself to be kinder, to cut out the incessant worrying and the frustration because it's all happening for a reason. The reason may be elusive in the moment, but there is always a point being made.
As the verdant colors of summer shift to those of autumn, I look forward to sharing my favorite season with my little one. The golds and browns and oranges and reds. The cozy sweaters and the hoodies. I also look forward to celebrating her first birthday, helping her take her first steps, and taking road trips with her Daddy and her. She already says 10+ words on her own; reading/studying books is her favorite pastime.
August 13, 2017
August 02, 2017
Our world is full of questions; the unknown frightens. And to most people, the unknown is the scariest monster of all for we thrive on following strict schedules and patterns and (sadly, in many respects) each other. The darkness, in truth, embodies only as much fright as we project onto it. If only we saw some value - something to learn - in the darkness and the unknown would we see that clarity ripples just beneath the surface. The darkness, after all, always turns to light.
July 27, 2017
A few weeks ago, we went on our first mini family vacation. We drove up to the mountains. The drive was fine until the windy ascent into the mountains, but baby A. was a trooper who only got carsick once. Still, as a first-time mother, I was nervous and kept the throw-up baggie in hand. The entire trip!
We took baby on a leisurely paved walk to a waterfall in the area. She slept in her carrier for most of the hike, but awoke toward the end of it to vibrant green trees and cloudless blue skies. (One of her favorite pastimes is to watch leaves on trees blow in the wind.) She loved it. Above is a photo of the creek that leads to the waterfall, which was abundantly filled with snowmelt. I'm glad that the years-long drought we've been experiencing was broken this year. It made for beautiful hiking scenery and a healthy forest.
Overnight trips with a baby, even a short one like ours, are stressful. Is she cold? Hot? Hungry? Going to sleep through the night, or wake the neighbors? And in my case: Is she going to throw up, and when? But new situations force you to reexamine what you can handle and more importantly, what your baby can. (And yes, she handled things much better than I thought she would.) We slept little, ate when we could, stressed continuously, and got out into nature for a bit. Our reward was baby A.'s awe-filled laughter and smiles. It's the little joys that matter, always the little joys. Parenthood is quite a trip.